My Apology Letter

I apologize for walking into your life
just because mine was a mess.

I apologize for using you
to mend my freshly broken heart
before stopping to ask
if you possibly needed a band aid for yours as well.

I apologize for trying too hard.

I apologize for being too available,
always there,
even when you didn't want me.

I apologize for ignoring your silent no.

I apologize for pushing the physicality
because emotions make me insecure
due to past experiences.

I apologize for thinking that
taking it slow
meant you didn't really want me.

I apologize for saying "I love you too"
when I should've said
"It's too soon".

I apologize for believing you so fiercely and naively.

I apologize for bringing him
into our relationship
because I thought
he could help me avoid making the mistakes I made with him.

I apologize for not considering your feelings
when I brought up his name,
or laughed at inappropriate times.

I apologize for being willing
to jump if you told me to,
but only if you held my hand.

I apologize for asking for a future
when there have been times
that you haven't even wanted a tomorrow.

I apologize for showing you how much I loved you.

I apologize for having asked for an explanation
because when you gave it to me,
I felt my world cave in
and I'm still not ready to clean up the debris.

I apologize for still loving you.

I apologize for wanting you to hold my hand.

I apologize for the tears I've cried over you.

I apologize.

I love you.